Everything I Know I Learned from Downton
We’re now half-way through the second season of Downton Abbey, and I thought I’d share a few tidbits of information I’ve learned from the British drama (most of which are meant to be humorous).
Edith could learn a thing or two from Dame Maggie Smith.
1. My hair would look so much better if I had an Anna.
2. I would probably subscribe to a newspaper if I had someone to iron it for me.
3. If a man’s idea of a first date is snooping, he’s probably up to no good.
4. Don’t let an unusual man in your bed, especially if he’s not British.
5. If a man asks you to marry him, say yes. If he loses his fortune/someone better comes along, you can always take it back.
6. If a woman has enough power to keep you out of war, take her up on it. Cowardess is an option.
7. Don’t kiss the farmer who has a wife. She’s probably watching, and you’ll probably be out of a job.
8. Sisters share clothes, even wealthy ones.
9. Speaking of sisters, watch your back. Blood or no blood, they will ruin your life (with your shirt on their back).
Sisters, sisters, there were never such devoted sisters,
Never had to have a chaperon, no sir,
I’m there to keep my eye on her
Caring, sharing, every little thing that we are wearing
When a certain gentleman arrived from Rome
She wore the dress, and I stayed home.
10. Even the butler has his favorite.
11. Everyone else has their favorite too - and it isn’t you
12. There’s always a bad apple in the help. Better to weed them out before they poison the bushel.
13. If your wife is about to go to prison, don’t cover for her. She probably deserves it.
14. If you drop the soap, you pick it up. Best not leave that to your bitter lady’s maid.
15. Weekends are for the working class. (via Dowager Countess Violet)
16. No one wants to kiss a girl in black. (via the same, because everything that comes out of her mouth is gold)
17. Never hire progressive thinkers. They cause trouble.
18. Next DIY home project: installing a bell. They’re handy.
19. If he’s going to war, you accept his proposal. If he’s dying, you marry him.
20. “Every mountain is “unclimbable”
until someone climbs it. So every ship
is “unsinkable” until it sinks.” Thank
you very much Lord Grantham.
Required Reading for Downton Fans
So, it’s Monday. Which is honestly made more depressing by the fact that I’ll have to wait an entire week to get my Downton on. Not even Gossip Girl’s royal wedding event/100th episode (which I have not watched yet) can entice me. So I’ve compiled a list of books to make the weekly withdraw a little less Downton deprived. After all, it’s called intelligent television for a reason.
For Love of the Crawleys’
Looking over my Tumblr/Twitter/Blog I came to the abrupt conclusion that I am obsessed with Downton Abbey. Its been known to happen before. I spent roughly two years of my youth convinced I was Belle. The late ’90s found my walls plastered with cutouts of Leonardo Dicaprio and ‘My Heart Will Go On’ rocking my boombox 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Let’s not forget the Harry Potter obsession that spanned more than a decade of my life. Immediately following the end scene of the final chapter, I was well on my way to an infatuation with the Starks of Winterfell. This was cut short by my sudden, overpowering and all-consuming obsession with… Downton Abbey. I came in late to the party, with the second season already underway on PBS, but all I needed was a lazy day and Netflix streaming to get hooked on the show everyone else was already talking about. The series has inspired me to listen to classical music (yea, I bought the soundtrack), read All Quiet on the Western Front, and reconsider that tan I was looking forward to this summer. Yes, most obsessions are unhealthy, this one has already refined my musical tastes, inspired me to read a classic I’ve been meaning to read for years, and bask in the glory of a pale but healthy glow… sounds like improvement to me! So while I may be taking it a little overboard, I’ll let it slide just this once.
If you are, sadly, in the dark about this phenomenon (as I was just two short weeks ago), here’s why you should be watching Masterpiece Classic on Sundays at 9pm.